3/13/2013

HBM's Top 10 Video Game Badasses

Hey guys. You like games right? And you like awesome moments in games? How about the guys who are basically walking awesome moments? Well, whether you do or not, these are the top 10 of those guys, the video game badasses. Just remember that it's my list, so anyone Only one per series, as usual. Spoilers, too.

#10: Magnus (Kid Icarus)

"Don't hit me, and we'll get along just fine..."
Magnus is basically Jecht from Final Fantasy X if he was a little more heroic (and, y'know, not a fucking giant space whale 99% of the time...). He has a badass voice, a huge fucking sword, and he's the only human who can beat the hell out of Underworld monsters, Centurions, and Pit. In the Kid Icarus-verse, you can't get much more badass than that.

#9: Akuma (Street Fighter)

"I am Akuma, and I will show you the meaning of pain!"
Akuma is what happens when you take Bruce Lee and pump him full of steroids. He knows more powerful versions of Ryu's moveset, can do that badass dash-afterimage-thing, and of course, the Shun Goku Satsu. And don't get me started on Oni!

#8: Bass.EXE (Mega Man Battle Network)

"Battle is my forte!"
Bass is just one of those characters who's so badass that I loved him the first time I saw him. Plus, he's always a pretty damn hard boss! His LifeAura protects him from low damage, he has extremely powerful attacks, and in some games, you are basically required to use overpoweful methods to beat him. No matter which form Bass is in, he's always been extremely awesome.

#7: Riku (Kingdom Hearts)

"I walk the road to dawn!"
Riku is probably one of my favorite video game protagonists. He starts out snarky but cool, then turns dark, and even through his angsty period he manages to kick plenty of ass in Castle Oblivion. In the end of KH2, Riku finally gets a keyblade, joins the party, and kicks some serious Nobody ass. Then, in KH3D, he's the one to pass the Mastery exam instead of Sora! The fact that he uses darkness, and that his blade looks fucking awesome, don't hurt.

#6: Link (Legend of Zelda)

"HEEYAAAA~!"

What would it be like to have your soul reincarnated over multiple generations, and each time you're a total badass? Well, I imagine that would be a lot like being Link. All iterations of Link are the reincarnation of a hero who saved the goddess Hylia, have all mastered multiple weapons, defeated insanely powerful demons and warriors, and always manage to save their generation's Princess Zelda from pure evil. In the end, there's not much Nintendo characters who can match that level of awesome.

#5: Solid Snake (Metal Gear)

"Kept you waiting, huh?"
You would probably think Big Boss would be on this list, considering his track record so far. However, I say Snake is more badass because not only has he killed Big Boss TWICE, but he also beats the hell out of a Cyborg Ninja with his fists, takes down multiple giant robot-tanks with just a few missiles, and even when he's dying and constantly having seizures and shit, Snake still manages to survive half his face getting 3rd degree burns with nothing but a bandage, and crawls through a microwave that would have cooked anyone else and survives. Outside of canon, he beats the hell out of various Nintendo characters (oh, and Sonic) in Super Smash Bros. Brawl. Dude's got balls of steel.

#4: Dante (Devil May Cry)

"I'm absolutely crazy about it!"
Dante is one of the most obvious choices for this kind of list. He's a gun/sword wielding half-demon who just can't die, and he takes down the most threatening of demons! And he does this all with the cockiest attitude he can! He's an example of what all protagonists should strive to be! Of course, I'm only talking about Classic Dante here, not New Dante.

#3: Kratos (God of War)

"YOU WILL NOT SEE THE END OF THIS DAY!"
One of the only things more badass than a half-demon is a demigod-turned-god. Kratos is one of many sons of Zeus, and it shows. He can kill anything using whatever he can get his hands on, or just his hands if need be. He's a rage-filled walking mass of destruction, and definitely worthy of his (former) spot of God of War.

#2: Sephiroth (Final Fantasy)

"Shall I give you despair?"
Okay, I'll admit this is a bit biased, but it's my list, so fuck you haters. Anyway, Sephiroth has the longest sword, like, ever, has access to insane magic, and very nearly murders the planet and becomes a god! When he dies, he just waits in the Lifestream for a new body! Plus, he's a pretty badass bonus boss in KH1 and KH2. My favorite video game character, and you're not going to change my mind!

#1: Asura (Asura's Wrath)

"COME ON!!"
Yeah, even I have to admit that Sephiroth's not quite as badass as Asura. Dude is powered by his own rage, which is so massive that his body can barely contain it! He punches demigods in the face until they explode, or his arms do! No matter what, Asura will destroy anything he hates, even GOD HIMSELF! And even with all this rage, he still makes it a point to protect the innocent, and for the most part, succeeds! That's how you know someone's the ultimate badass.

So yeah, that's that. I'll be back next week for my Ascension review.

HBM Signing Out.

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